It's Me or the Dog

To borrow a line from a television show that Hunter often watches, it's me or the dog.  Most of my friends, especially the ones who have been over to our house, are familiar with my evil dog, Cody.  I am not necessarily a dog person.  It's not that I don't like animals, but I have never had the whole -dog as part of your family- experience...until Cody. 

Cody's with his best friend Miley

 Now to set the record straight, he is the most ill-behaved animal that I have ever came into contact with.  He barks, he destroys, he chases elderly neighbors and postal workers out of our yard, and yes he may occasionally take a nip out of a person.  You've heard the quote, "A dog will not bite the hand that feeds him"? Not so true in Cody's case.  Just last week, he sank his teeth into my hand because I unnerved him.  He is a beautiful miniature daschund, but please don't let the innocent face fool you.  He is a terror.  It's funny how you can come to love something that is so contrary and difficult.  Maybe that's how Kevin feels about me?? Ha!  It has come to be a joke to people who are close to us.  I even briefly advertised to get rid of him on facebook once, but people who knew about him quickly warned others. 

He went through the entire family's church shoes in one week.  The list of things that he has destroyed would add up to thousands (and no, this is not even a slight exaggeration).   When we returned home after the fire, he immediately set to work on the brand new sofa.  I was so frustrated with him that I closed him in the laundry room with a baby gate.  I came home to find the brand new dryer hose had been disconnected from the wall (and shredded).  One night I was happily playing on the computer when I lost my internet connection- you guessed it; he went under the desk and chewed all the cords.  He has yet to be potty trained.  I had to warn people not to pet him unless they wanted a puddle on their shoe.
He had to move outside...

Once he was settled into outdoor living, he quickly decided to take the neighborhood hostage.  He ran in people's yards, barked and growled at children, and even stole things from the neighboring homes and lovingly placed them on our doorstep, after he demolished them.

I had to purchase a $300 pet containment system, and I was not happy about it.  Now Cody is confined to his circular boundaries of our home.  It's pretty funny to watch people walk up while Cody barks and shows his teeth.  They don't know he has to stop at a certain point, but he does.  The fright in their eyes caused by this 8 inch tall menace is hysterical. He has full reign of the carport and patio.  This was a problem around Christmas when I returned home from school to find a Toys'RUs package already opened and destroyed because the UPS driver left it too close to the little piranha.

He is adjusting well.  He suns on the patio table, no matter how many times I shoo him away.  He has a girlfriend, a bulldog. Please, no questions.

I have to admit that I miss him when he is outside, so I sneak him in when Kevin isn't around.  Usually he tears something up, then has to go back outside.  For example, Ryan's new baseball glove...

I understand him...he understands me.   He doesn't mean to do bad things.We have finally made that human-dog connection. Most importantly, he has become my buddy. I'll admit it...he has grown on me.  He loves me as long as I obey him.  Whenever I sit down, he jumps in my lap.  So what if he has mud on his paws; it doesn't matter at all to him.  He warns me if anyone should come to the house.  He takes his job as protector of the family very seriously.  I must say that he brightens my day in so many ways.  Even those time that I may want to give him away, I know that no-one else on earth would take him.  If they did, they would return him.  That is just fine with me.